(ARA) - That vacant, foreclosed home next door isn't just bringing down your neighborhood's property values. It may also be a haven for a myriad of pests that can threaten the health and safety of neighbors, children and pets.

Ah! Your sh*theads are sooo sweet! Would you like a piece of meat? Message from GHW Bush - "All Texans talk like sh*theads! All sh*theads talk sweet, or no one would let them live!" Stop all teleprompting of the "puppet ruler"!

They're coming. Another horde of alien invaders. See them yet? No? Maybe you'll hear 'em first. Listen for an otherworldly hiss. They hiss when angry. They hiss (much like a certain ex-girlfriend) when amorous.

Today Flight 93 lecture — Superintendent Joanne Hanley of the Flight 93 National Memorial will lecture from 7 to 9 p.m. in the Lyceum lecture series at the Cuyahoga Valley National Park. Hanley will be joined by a victim's family member. The program wi

Zion's Secrect Police; i.e. Secret Service, must number @ 120,000 by now, for it would be 250,000 if they kept up their growth rate from the second half of the last century. Don't get shook! I can save them along with every Bush Nazi that supports them!